The Horror, The Horror
No, this small essay is NOT going to be about Joseph Conrad or Heart of Darkness. I love them both and Heart of Darkness is one of my favorite books. However, that essay, and the one that compares him to Melville will have to wait.
No, this is about the most horrific outfit I have seen in a long time and I've seen some awful outfits-and they looked wearable compared to this. It was (I believe) overall-like in design. It was one piece, had a bib-like front with shoulder straps, so I'm pretty sure it was overalls. HOWEVER...
1) This garment was made from some pale (cream or a very pale yellow) color and was in a very lightweight fabric
2) How do I know this without feeling the fabric, you ask? Well, said garment had HUGE BILLOWY POCKETS. These pockets gathered in the back, right around the waist and then billowed out over the hips and thighs, then tapered to right above the ankle. It reminded me of those MC Hammer pants, but in a very dowdy way. Trust me, it was easy tell what the material was like.
3) And what was under this lovely garment? Let me first say that the lady wearing this awful piece of clothing was skinny as rail and this outfit made even her look like she had an extra 20 pounds around her hips. Who needs or wants that? So underneath she had a red and gray wide-striped short-sleeved t-shirt. Let me tell you that even had this garment been of an acceptable cut of pants or a skirt, the t-shirt would have gone with said pants or skirt in any way shape or form.
Oh God, it was ugly. I just wanted to grab her by hand and tell her to put the book down that was clutched to her chest (and I love to read but who says you can't love to read and be well-dressed? You have to buy clothes SOMETIME, you know. They don't have to be awful) just for a second and let me take her whatever store was in her price point. Target? I can go there. Sears, even. Banana Republic on sale? It's a good time to look for summer clothes right now, a lot are on sale. We could go to some resale stores-or I would buy things for her at the resale stores in San Francisco when I go in the fall-great clothes and you can get four or 5 pieces for under $100!
The t-shirt would have been okay with a decent pair of khakis or some jeans, but that it-that awful overall, MC Hammer-like garment needs to be thrown away. You can do better-I promise.
No, this is about the most horrific outfit I have seen in a long time and I've seen some awful outfits-and they looked wearable compared to this. It was (I believe) overall-like in design. It was one piece, had a bib-like front with shoulder straps, so I'm pretty sure it was overalls. HOWEVER...
1) This garment was made from some pale (cream or a very pale yellow) color and was in a very lightweight fabric
2) How do I know this without feeling the fabric, you ask? Well, said garment had HUGE BILLOWY POCKETS. These pockets gathered in the back, right around the waist and then billowed out over the hips and thighs, then tapered to right above the ankle. It reminded me of those MC Hammer pants, but in a very dowdy way. Trust me, it was easy tell what the material was like.
3) And what was under this lovely garment? Let me first say that the lady wearing this awful piece of clothing was skinny as rail and this outfit made even her look like she had an extra 20 pounds around her hips. Who needs or wants that? So underneath she had a red and gray wide-striped short-sleeved t-shirt. Let me tell you that even had this garment been of an acceptable cut of pants or a skirt, the t-shirt would have gone with said pants or skirt in any way shape or form.
Oh God, it was ugly. I just wanted to grab her by hand and tell her to put the book down that was clutched to her chest (and I love to read but who says you can't love to read and be well-dressed? You have to buy clothes SOMETIME, you know. They don't have to be awful) just for a second and let me take her whatever store was in her price point. Target? I can go there. Sears, even. Banana Republic on sale? It's a good time to look for summer clothes right now, a lot are on sale. We could go to some resale stores-or I would buy things for her at the resale stores in San Francisco when I go in the fall-great clothes and you can get four or 5 pieces for under $100!
The t-shirt would have been okay with a decent pair of khakis or some jeans, but that it-that awful overall, MC Hammer-like garment needs to be thrown away. You can do better-I promise.
posted by SHbookworm at 5:19 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home